bedquest: dear fucking tumblr this is a fucking bumblebee this is a fucking bee this is a fucking hornet this is a fucking wasp as you can fucking see the longer their legs are and the less fuzzy they are is equivalent to how fucking evil they fucking are
This is my life
pizzaforpresident: fffcuk: pizzaforpresident: pizzaforpresident: IM ON THE PHONE WITH A VITAMIN COMPANY TO FIND OUT WHY THE BOTTLES ARE SO BIG IF THE PILLS ONLY TAKE UP 10% OF THE SPACE INSIDE IT’S BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO PUT ALL THE INGREDIENTS AND WARNINGS IN BOTH FRENCH AND ENGLISH SO THE BOTTLE HAS TO BE BIG ENOUGH TO SUPPORT A LABEL WITH ALL THAT TEXT why are you screaming I’M JUST...
youbetter-runlike-thedevil: stormpooper: zooeyclairedeschanel: stop saying I can’t even and start saying I can even believe in urself is that a lawn mower flying no, it’s a lawn mower following it’s dreams
teeen-vogue: an apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough
wartortles: sometimes u just need ur genitals massaged by someones mouth u know
thorki: I JUST SAW A GUY AT WALMART AND HE LOOKED LIKE MORGAN FREEMAN AND HE CAUGHT ME LOOKING AT HIM AND HE POINTED AT ME AND SAID “IM NOT MORGAN FREEMAN”
convolutedscience: assiest: double standards disgust me. when a guy sleeps with a ton of women he’s a stud but when a girl sleeps with a ton of women she’s a lesbian That was not the way I expected that sentence to end.